Monday, January 14, 2013

Regression Depression




For me, the hardest thing to deal with as a parent is when your child achieves a momentous milestone (like sleeping five hours straight) and then however long later (3 days) stops doing it.  I blame the many sit-coms I watched growing up that infallibly had a sleep through the night episode if any of the characters became parents.  It has been drilled into my brain that once a child sleeps through the night, all the hilarity (tears) end and sweet, sweet sleep begins, never again being interrupted until the teenage sneaking out episodes begin.

Thankfully, I have been down this road before, so the inconsistent sleep patterns of a wee babe aren't utterly devastating to me like they were the first time around.  I knew better this time, but I will always be an optimist and I had hoped for the best.  Optimist or not, if one more lady at church says their baby slept through the night at five weeks and never fusses while it is awake, I will wipe the floor with her.  Okay, only one mom said that to me, but it is the last thing a Christian woman should say to someone that looks as tired as I do.

Yes, Ash is an easier babe than River.  Yes, I am better prepared with what to expect this time.  Yes, I have already given up any notion of free time... but this is still hard as holy heck and I can't wait for the sweet bliss of a regular sleep schedule to arise.  Taking a 2 hour nap 2 days in a row at the same time and then not doing it again is cruel.  I need to know when I can get stuff done. (Get out of my apartment before I choke to death on the egg shell colored walls.)

P.S.  I am pretty sure I need a 12 step recovery program from the book Babywise.  Even though I haven't picked it up since River was a newborn, I can't get their 3 hour feeding cycle out of my brain and I feel horrible guilt and anxiety every time I feed Ash sooner than that or feed him to put him down for naps.  Other books even say it is okay, but because Babywise was the first sleep book I read and I was in such a desperate place when I read it, it is stuck in my brain like gospel.  Can we say intervention now please?





7 comments:

IrisLillie said...

Yup, you and I read totally different baby books... as did my mother and I... Her philosphy was closer to yours.. I was reading hippy type books, that were more into let them eat when hungry and sleep where they drop... Add that to being around Betty Mills kids that were turning out just fine (tho I was always suspicious of Susie) I just didn't worry to much about a schedule.. By the way... you turned out just fine... and I'd like to think, so did I...

Candice said...

So Cute! I read too many books as well, and it stressed me out. I tried to keep Steele and Sarah on their feeding schedules, and sometimes I think that was why Steele was so skinny. Still, they lurk in the back of my mind...

annette said...

Oh, Lil, I know how you're feeling...I'm going to leave you with these thoughts:

1. Everything that feels like a set back is just a phase. PHASES PASS!

2. You're doing great. You are a wonderful mama.

3. I don't deal with other moms bragging about their newborn babies sleeping through the night, but I do deal with them bragging about their 3 1/2 year olds knowing how to write their names and spell disestablishmentarianism. Grayson can't even colour inside the lines. My point is, it's always something, isn't it?

Susann House said...

What did I ever do to make you suspicious iris?

Jessica Lynn said...

I can't believe how scrumptious those little cheeks are!

As for advice, I've got none. But, that's probably all the advice you'd want from someone that doesn't have any kids of their own.

On the bright side, I'm not bragging about my kid's achievments. However, my imaginary dog is extremely well trained and loves to go on long runs with me.

Scott and Stacia said...

That is the cutest picture ever!!! What a cutie pie! I always tell people it is tough until the 4th month...then you get a little more sleep and you can be a little better mother...hang in there. Can't wait to see you guys!

IrisLillie said...

Awwww, Susie... Has it been so long you forgotten my warped sense of humor.... You know your my favorite...