A Quickie

Get your mind out of the gutter folks, this is a family blog.  I just have a quick minute to write, because I need every spare second I have this weekend to write my talk for church this Sunday.  However, I am finding it hard to focus, so I think clearing some brain space, by writing down a few things here, might be a good idea.
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My favorite thing about awards season is movie studios sending me free dvds in the mail, to try to sway my vote for their film in the SAG Awards.  I guess if you factor in the fact that I pay SAG dues, then the dvds aren't really free, but they feel like it, so it's fun.  This year I got dvds of The Help, Moneyball, The Descendants,  The Artist, and Bridesmaids.  I got a free ticket to see The Iron Lady at a theater and I got a link to see Jay Edgar, Warrior and My Week With Marilyn on-line.  The problem is, I had to vote today and I received all of these things this week.
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Dear SAG, do you really think a mom has that much movie watching time on her hands and lets be honest... even if I did, there is no way River would let me wrestle Toy Story 3 out of the dvd player right now, so long story short... I managed to watch The Iron Lady, Bridesmaids and I had already seen The Help.  Here's how my vote went down.
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The first vote was on Best Male Actor in a Leading Role.  In this category was two people I didn't know (who probably deserved the award), Brad Pitt, George Clooney, and Leonardo DiCaprio.  If this was 1997, I might have had a freaking heart attack choosing between Tristan and Romeo... ughh... I mean Brad and Leo, but since Leo hasn't aged very well and the only two people I find more condescending then Brad right now are George Clooney and Matt Damon, my dilemma was decidedly different than what it would have been back then.  I couldn't decide based on current performances, since I hadn't seen any of the movies, so in the end, I decided puffy genetics beats out irritating smugness and in a move I never thought I'd make, I voted against my favorite actor Brad Pitt.
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Now people, this does not put me in the same category as the people that vote on the President based on his hair cut, if he plays a musical instrument and whether or not his episode of Saturday Night Live was funny.  It definitely doesn't put me in the category of people that vote based on if he is a he or a she, what church he/she attends and what color he/she is.  That being said, I apologize to the two people in this category who I didn't know.  I should have at least googled you to see if you looked puffy or smug.

Commitmentphobes

I never thought I was.  I either like something, or I don't and if I do... I like it a lot and rarely change my mind.  In tune with myself, self assured, etc..  But then came the "where should we move" question, combined with the complication of it no longer being entirely my decision.  For years we have poured over every nook and cranny of this decision and instead of things becoming more clear, they have become decidedly more confusing.  Did you catch that... YEARS!

Salt Lake was supposed to be a get out of LA quick card.  We were going to escape the traffic, pollution, lack of parking and over abundance of people by moving to Salt Lake and then quickly decide where we should go from there.  That was September 2006.

Here's the problem(s) if you care to read.  Maybe you will be better at figuring out a solution than we are.

*Acting... we love it and though it would be impossible to build a career in Salt Lake with the kind of roles that audition here, we do like that we still get to audition sometimes and have it in our lives.  We're not sure if we are ready to write-off that part of our life yet.

*We hate the pollution here.  I mean really hate it.  We read an article about how it takes ten years off your life and is the equivalent to smoking a pack of cigarettes a day.  Not cool.  We are not city people, but acting basically requires a city.

*We visited Kalispell, MT right before we moved here and we both love it.  It is a charming town, surrounded by gorgeous views everywhere.  The weather is amazing in the summer... 80's tops.  The winter is snowy, but even though it is further North, it is a lower elevation and not quite as cold as Salt Lake.  It actually has similar weather patterns to Seattle.  We have friends there, but no family and since it is a smaller town, with a smaller airport.... traveling to see family would be very expensive and neither side would be in driving distance.  Also, jobs are few, pay not great and housing is expensive.  Plus, we'd practically be Canadian.

*Bear's mom and younger brother live in Casper, Wyoming.  He would love to go there and has apparently always assumed he would go back to Wyoming.  I worry about the lack of support system for me and the little man.  Utah rocks with mom's groups and play dates.  Lots of options in education.  I wouldn't know for sure till I moved there, but the Wyomingites I know seem to keep to themselves and I die in isolation.  Plus the wind is always blowing and this is a major catastrophe for someone with fine hair that tangles like crazy.  I always feel unkept there, like I would never, ever have a good hair day.  I know it sounds silly, but it is the little things that make or break us people... Cross my heart.  Job pay low, houses cheaper than MT, but not cheap.

*Most of my family, minus my Mid-West yearning sister that is currently stuck in LA, live in Kansas City, MO.  I like it because... well... it is awesome.  Yes, the humidity frightens me a little and the fact they had record breaking temps last summer, send me running for MT, but you can't beat Mid West housing prices and the average salary is higher than the mountain west.  Plus, the people are so nice.  There are a lot of cute towns outside the city, with oak trees... let me repeat... Oak Trees!  And since I haven't lived in driving distance from my family since May of 1996, I would love the chance to live by them for a little while.  Bear hates the idea of chiggers and no mountains.

*Cache Valley... aka... My Happy Place.  If we are staying in Utah, I would love to go back to Cache Valley.  It is my size town and has plenty of more rural locations than Logan to choose from.  Less jobs than Salt Lake, but pay seems to be about the same.  My canyon in my backyard and my lake just up the street... okay... 50 minutes up the street, but still.  I have friends there, but Bear doesn't and so he prefers to stay in Salt Lake if we are staying in UT.

*Salt Lake... we don't hate you, but we don't love you and you feel like a default.  Like we can't decide, so we might as well stay here.  I have a good network of Mom friends here, which truly is a lifeline when you have young children.  We pretty much have a house that we kinda like, but in our price range that is probably as good as it gets.  Bear wouldn't have to transfer his job and lose his seniority.  We don't live by family, but Bear's family is an eight hour drive and the Salt Lake airport has decent prices for my family and we are already here.

So that's it.  Writing it out didn't make it anymore clear.  How we wish we had the kind of jobs that would say, we need you to move here and then we would make the best of it and start a new adventure, but trying to figure out the perfect place is going to be the death of us.  Sorry for the rambling.  I just needed to get it off my chest.  The closer we get to buying this house, the more claustrophobic I feel.  It is my freedom loving Sagittarius side kicking in and I have the Dixie Chick's song Ready to Run playing on repeat in my head.

January Thus Far

Despite our nine zillion parties in December, I am having trouble believing that Christmas has come and gone.  Without snow, it just doesn't feel real.  I gave up waiting to see my Christmas lights sparkling off of gleaming white snow and got everything put away shortly after New Year's.  I didn't want to be "those" neighbors.  Not that anyone would notice on my culdesac in Sugar Hood... we have quite the assortment of trees shoved on porches and upside down in dumpsters (next to couches of course) and more than a few strands of lights half up and half down.
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I am getting a cold tonight.  I don't really think it's fair.  I have a ton going on right now and I'm already having trouble keeping up.  I think I need to ask for a sickness exemption.  I get scared whenever I do that, because what if I get something worse next time and I used up my exemption.  However, I fully believe that the worst sickness imaginable is the one you have right now, so yeah... give me that exemption.
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River took his turning two very seriously and fully committed to the terrible twos.  He howls and wails, gnashes teeth and I'm pretty sure he is going to have multiple head wounds from throwing himself back on to any and every surface with no regard to how it makes me feel watching him smash his head on concrete.  He also is a big fan of time out.  I say, "River! Do you want to go to time out?" and he says, "Uh huh!" and runs to his time out chair with a happy smile on his face.  If this keeps up, I'm going to be the one smashing my head on concrete.
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Despite our daily battles, River always does at least one thing each day that I find incredibly charming.  Today it was him putting on deodorant after he saw me do it.  I tried to give it to him with the cap on, which he quickly removed and then rubbed white deodorant all over his belly.  Then he had to repeat the process with daddy's deodorant.  He looked so incredibly self assured and pleased with the outcome, I couldn't help but laugh. That is, until I tried to wipe off the flaky white mess all over his shirt and he threw his head back into the corner of the bathroom sink.  Geesh!
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Also, if you ever have to do fertility testing and they tell you to come in for a day three ultra sound, they don't mean the nice easy ultra sound on your belly.  Just thought I'd give you a heads up.